Suicide.org - Suicide Prevention, Awareness, and Support

Suicide.org is a 501c3 NON-PROFIT Organization and Website

Suicide.org Suicide Survivors Forum - Click for Info!


Jacque Moore Memorial


Jacque Moore
Jacque Moore Tapes a Rape Awareness Video

Remembering an Angel:
Rape Survivor and Rape Victim Advocate
Jacque Moore

by Kevin Caruso

On December 2, 1999, a rapist broke into the South Carolina home of Jacque Moore and entered her bedroom.

The rapist jumped on her bed, and at first, Jacque thought it was one of her children so she was not scared.

But she quickly became horrified when she realized that it was an intruder.

"You're gonna die, bitch," were the terrifying words she heard as this piece-of-garbage criminal grabbed her throat.

It was about midnight.

The criminal then raped and beat hear repeatedly.

"Where are you God?" Jacque screamed as the criminal kept attacking her. "Aren't you supposed to be on my side? I'm a good woman. Please! My children and grandchildren need me. Don't let me die this way. Who will find me?"

The rapist yelled back, "Don't die yet, bitch! Don't you die on me yet! I'm not through with you yet!"

The rapes and beatings continued for six and a half hours.

Jacque was still horrified, was in a deep state of shock, and was in bad shape physically, but she was still able to exhibit tremendous intelligence and courage when she calmly told the rapist, "You need to leave. The sun is coming up. You don't want anyone to see you. I promise not to call the police."

The rapist left.

Jacque immediately called the police.

She was able to give a detailed description of the rapist to the police, and investigators quickly had a suspect in mind - John Brinson.

The police knew this disgusting, cowardly, piece-of-garbage rapist too well. He had been convicted of numerous sex crimes before and had spent half of his adult life in prison.

He was arrested the next day.

Ten months later, Jacque would see the rapist again, this time in court.

With Jacque's family giving her strong support, she faced the rapist throughout the trial, and watched the jury foreman as the verdict was read: "Guilty."

The rapist was found guilty on all three charges that were brought against him: sexual misconduct, burglary, and kidnapping.

Because the coward had previous convictions, he already had "two strikes" under South Carolina's three-strike law. With this conviction, the piece-of-garbage now had his third strike.

The loser was sentenced to three terms of life in prison without the possibility of parole.

Although the cowardly rapist was now in prison for life, Jacque continued to struggle with powerful emotions and severe depression.

She decided to become an advocate for other rape victims -- she wanted to do all that she could to help others who had experienced the horror of rape.

And she wrote a book.

"I know the woman on the bed is me, but my mind still won't accept it," she wrote in her book. "I want to shout, 'No! No! I refuse for this to happen to me.' People say I am lucky to be alive, but I am not sure. Did I live? Is this living? You see, my mind and body can't let go on reliving this night over and over and over. I am trapped inside a nightmare. I pretend to live in the world, but I don't do a very good job."

But in spite of her deep emotional pain and depression, she took every opportunity that she could to speak about her ordeal and to help other rape victims.

She emphasized that rape victims are oftentimes victimized twice: first by the rape, and then by the legal system.

She also spoke out against giving plea bargains to rapists. She wanted to see all rapists serve the maximum time possible.

She even toured the prison where the piece-of-garbage who raped her was serving his life sentence. "I know what he did to me," she said. "I wanted to see what I did to him."

But Jacque's depression and deep emotional pain were causing her to become paranoid, her friends said. She feared that the rapist would get a new trial and somehow get out of jail. She also believed that he belonged to a gang and members of that gang were going to rape her again.

Eventually, she purchased a gun for protection and stopped working.

She visited her family less and slept more.

And she took medication for depression and anxiety.

"We knew something was wrong but she didn't want to hear us," said Dobbie Green, Jacque's son. "She said she was strong. She thought she was being strong for all rape victims. She thought she was their voice."

Unbelievably, in May, two of the cowardly rapist's convictions were overturned because of a simple error in the trial. But the kidnapping conviction was upheld and the loser still faced life in prison without the possibility of parole.

But Jacque's depression became much worse because of this news.

She believed that the rapist was going to be released and that she would have to endure another trial, or, even worse, that the prosecutors would decide not to retry him.

On July 4, Jacque called one of her daughters and told her that she had taken an overdose of pills the night before because she wanted to kill herself. And that instead of dying, she woke up and received news that her sister-in-law had died of cancer.

She told her daughter that she wanted to go to the funeral to offer support for her brother. She also assured her daughter that she would not kill herself because her brother needed her.

Jacque's daughter called her brother Dobbie immediately afterwards. They did not know what to do. They contemplated getting their mother to a hospital. But they decided not to because they strongly believed that she would not die by suicide because of the funeral.

They planned to talk to her after the funeral and make sure that she received help.

But late that night, at about 3:30 a.m., Jacque sat down at her computer and wrote a suicide note. It would be the last time that she would write about the rape.

She then got her revolver, went in her bed, and shot herself in the head.

"John Brinson [the rapist] killed my mom," Dobbie said. "She was a happy, trusting, positive person [before the rape].

Jacque Moore died by suicide on July 5, 2004, at the age of 63.

She was an incredible person.

She is now an angel.

We miss you Jacque.

Free Suicide.org Newsletter!
Enter Your Email:





















Suicide.org

Important additional information about Suicide.org - Please read:

Please consider linking your site to Suicide.org so anyone who is suicidal may receive the immediate help that they need. But please do not reproduce any part of Suicide.org on the Internet. Also: You are strongly encouraged to distribute copies of any of the pages of Suicide.org (in print media only -- not on the Internet) for noncommercial, nonprofit use to any person, group or organization that may benefit from it. Schools are particularly suited to use Suicide.org for suicide prevention programs. Conditions for reprints: 1) You must leave the text intact, without alteration; 2) You must print the following notice verbatim at the top of each page: "Reprinted with permission from Suicide.org (http://www.Suicide.org). Written by Kevin Caruso. Copyright Kevin Caruso. All Rights Reserved."

Disclaimer and Terms of Use: Suicide.org is provided for informational and educational purposes only; is not intended to diagnose or treat suicidal individual; and is not intended to constitute medical advice. While care has been taken in the preparation of the information contained on Suicide.org, all information is provided on an "as is" basis without any representation, warranty or condition, whether express or implied, statutory or otherwise, as to: quality; accuracy; completeness; legality; reliability; efficacy; or fitness for any particular purpose. Anyone using this information does so at his or her own risk, and by using such information agrees to indemnify Suicide.org and its content providers from any and all liability, loss, injury, damages, costs and expenses (including legal fees and expenses) arising from such person's use of the information and resources on this website. Anyone who is suicidal should call 911 now and receive help from trained mental heath professionals.

Links to other sites from Suicide.org do not necessarily imply approval or endorsement of those sites.