What Should I do After a Suicide?
by Kevin Caruso
If you have lost someone to suicide, the pain and confusion may seem overwhelming.
So please reach out for help.
And one of the best sources for help is from other suicide survivors --
joining a suicide support group can be of immeasurable help. Other
suicide survivors can understand what you are going through and can support you.
We have a FREE Suicide.org Suicide Survivors Forum that you may join. Please click below for details:
Suicide.org Suicide Survivors Forum - Click for Info!
And below is a comprehensive directory of suicide support groups:
Suicide Support Groups
And get support from people who you love and trust.
Getting into therapy can also help. But please join a suicide support group and contact other suicide survivors in addition to going to therapy.
It is quite common for suicide survivors to suffer from depression. So getting into therapy immediately will help you deal with that depression if it occurs.
If you work, take as much time off as you can.
And try to get help with your daily affairs. The smallest of tasks may seem overwhelming, so ask for help when you need it.
Express how you feel.
Know that you are not alone.
Give yourself time to heal.
Stay away from people and places that bother you.
Know that you are not to blame.
Always reach out for help when you need it.
Reach out for help from other suicide survivors when you need it.
And understand that everyone grieves differently, so when it comes to grieving, your way is the best way.
You may deny what happened. Understand that almost everyone does that. It is a normal part of the healing process that you are going through.
You may feel suicidal yourself. If you do, understand that you are experiencing something that is very common and very understandable. But please reach out for help if you have suicidal thoughts.
You may feel strong anger. That too is normal.
You may feel strong guilt. And that is quite normal.
But please keep expressing your feelings and reaching out for help. Most likely, most of the suicide survivors that you will come in contact with will have experienced the same feelings that you are feeling, and they can support you.
You probably feel numb and have difficulty concentrating. Again that is normal.
Be gentle with yourself.
Give yourself time.
And when you feel like doing some reading, let me suggest a book. There are many excellent books on suicide, feel free to choose one that appeals to you.
And please keep in mind that you can decide not to answer any questions that others may ask you. If someone wants to know how your loved one died, you can say that you do not want to talk about it. It is up to you. Please remember that just because someone asks a question does not mean that you have to answer it. Again, any question that you do not want to answer, just say that you don't want to talk about it. No explanation is necessary.
And, again, stay away from people that bother you. You owe them nothing.
People can be insensitive. People can be rude. People can be intrusive.
You decide who you want to talk to, when you want to talk to them, and for how long you want to talk to them.
Also, unfortunately, there still is a stigma that exists about suicide. It is not fair. It is not right. And it does not make sense. But it does exist.
But keep in mind that people who are blindly following a social stigma have the problem of ignorance and insensitivity, not you. Stay away from them.
Surround yourself with people who understand. Who care. Who are sensitive. Who are not ignorant. And who will support you.
Reach out to those people. Never feel like you are a burden to them, because you are not.
And keep reaching out to suicide survivors.
Please take care of yourself, and take your healing one step at a time.
And remember that you are a special person.
I love you,